Anxiety or Fears Therapy - When Anxiety Becomes a Way of Living
- Michael Elwan

- Dec 30, 2025
- 3 min read

Anxiety is often misunderstood as excessive worry or nervousness. For many people, it is far more pervasive. It becomes a way of living in the world; constantly scanning, preparing, anticipating, and holding things together long after the original threats have passed.
Many of the people I work with are thoughtful, capable, and responsible. They manage work, relationships, and family commitments well enough that others rarely notice how much effort it takes. Yet internally, there is a persistent sense of tension; a feeling that something might go wrong, that rest is unsafe, or that letting go would come at a cost.
Anxiety or fears can show up as overthinking, physical tension, difficulty sleeping, irritability, avoidance, or a constant need to stay in control. For some, it is tied to earlier experiences of instability, caregiving, trauma, or cultural expectations that required strength and self-reliance. For others, it has grown quietly over time, reinforced by responsibility and unrelenting pace.
What is happening beneath the anxiety
Anxiety is not simply a faulty thought pattern. It is often the nervous system doing its best to protect you based on past learning. When safety has been uncertain, the body and mind adapt by staying alert. Over time, this state of vigilance can become exhausting, narrowing life and reducing a person’s capacity to feel present, connected, or at ease.
Many people delay seeking support because anxiety feels familiar, manageable, or justified. Others worry that therapy will push them to change too quickly or strip away coping strategies that have helped them survive. These concerns are understandable, especially for people who have spent years adapting without much support.
How therapy helps with anxiety or fears
Therapy for anxiety or fears is not about forcing calm or eliminating worry. It is about understanding the patterns that keep anxiety in place and gently expanding your capacity to respond differently when stress arises.
In our work together, we slow things down. We pay attention to what your anxiety is responding to, how it shows up in your body and relationships, and what it has been protecting you from. This process allows new options to emerge; not through pressure, but through increased safety, clarity, and choice.
My approach is relational, trauma-informed, and culturally responsive. I draw on emotionally focused, narrative, mindfulness-based, and acceptance-based frameworks to support both insight and regulation. This means we work with understanding and practical change at the same time; making sense of what is happening while strengthening your ability to stay grounded when anxiety rises.
About my work
I work with adults and couples who are often highly functional on the outside but internally exhausted from holding everything together. Therapy offers a space where you do not need to perform, explain yourself perfectly, or minimise what you are experiencing.
A gentle invitation
If anxiety has become a constant background presence in your life, you do not need to manage it alone. You do not need to wait until things fall apart to seek support. Beginning the conversation, even with uncertainty, is enough.
Therapy offers a way to relate to anxiety differently; with more understanding, compassion, and steadiness; so that it no longer runs your life.
Based in Perth, WA, LEXs provides telehealth counselling across Australia for individuals, couples, and NDIS participants. Services extend to Social Work supervision, Peer Work supervision, training, and keynote speaking on men’s mental health, CaLD community wellbeing, and culturally responsive suicide prevention; helping people and organisations make mental-health care more compassionate, inclusive, and effective. LEXs provides services across Australia, supporting clients in Perth, Melbourne, Sydney, Brisbane, and beyond. To learn more about our work across Australia, visit LEXs' services page.



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